Walking the Talk the Stress of Being Congruent

How many times have you given someone great advice, but in the back of you mind you knew that you didn't follow it yourself. I think we all have been guilty of that from time to time. You really wanted to help, but also you became stressed about being found out. This is called not walking the talk. Our intentions are good, but maybe there is a better way.

I remember a story I once heard about Gandhi, now I don't know if this is the correct version so please forgive me if I am off in the telling of it. It goes something like this...a woman traveled a week in the dry Indian desert with her daughter to see Gandhi and ask his help. When she finally got there she was allowed to meet with him. He asked her what she needed, she said that her daughter was addicted to sugar, that she was putting on so much weight that she was scared for her life. Gandhi just sat there, listened and then said come back in three weeks. The lady was at first upset, she traveled all that way, why not help her now, but she respected him and so she left. She traveled back home, stayed for about a week, and then with her daughter along side her went again to see Gandhi. When she arrived she was ushered straight in to see him. He then looked right into the daughter's eyes and said, "Don't eat sugar". Great,the mom thought, just what she needed to hear, she won't eat sugar again. But wait, why did I have wait 3 weeks to find this out, why couldn't he have said this earlier and saved all the struggle and time of crossing the Indian desert. So she asked him and he responded by saying that when she first came to see him, he was eating sugar. So for the next 3 weeks he stopped, now he doesn't eat sugar.

I liked that story. It has many different levels. The main being the topic of today's post. See there is no stress or worry about what we say to people when we give advice if we follow it ourselves. Stress comes from being found out, from being discovered. If we only share what we do ourselves, than there is no stress when it comes to helping others.

I applied this lesson of walking the talk a few days ago. A couple clients of mine were wanting to get eat healthier and get into better shape. Now trying to tell them to eat fruits and salads while I sat in my office later that day eating a couple of donuts was not really congruent. So I told them that I would make an eating plan for them in two weeks. The next day I said goodbye to Mr. Donut and hello to a more healthy style of eating. Two weeks later I gave my clients the new eating plan. Now not only are my clients going to benefit from my diet coaching, but my body will as well because now I am walking my talk and eating better too.

Til next time,

Wishing you the best,

Dr. John Zipp